Wow! May just flew by...don't you think? I can't believe it's already going to be June.
I had a wonderful birthday. No big fireworks or parades or surprise parties. We had a family lunch gathering for the actual birthday meal. A total of 8 at the party. Frog-more Stew was the main course (which is shrimp, potatoes, corn on the cob, and sausage all boiled in Crab Boil flavorings), watermelon and banana pudding for my "cake". Delicious! And, I really did most of the cooking, which is a major sign that I must be feeling better and getting stronger, because I couldn't have done that 6 weeks ago. Very nice gathering. Great birthday party.
Then Tommy and I went to Little Rock that night to go to an Arkansas Travelers baseball game. This was my idea, not his. I love baseball...what a great sporting event. You can sit back, chill out, talk, watch, look at people, and catch up on the game every once in awhile. The Travelers have a brand new stadium. It was such a lovely evening - cool weather and no bugs. Life is good.
Before the game I told Tommy I wanted to walk across the new walking trail bridge in Little Rock. When we got to the stadium someone told us it was not downtown, but about 10 miles away. SO...we walked across the bridge right by the stadium instead. It is a nice, old bridge (not TOO old) that had a sidewalk for pedestrians. We walked over and back, looking at the Arkansas River and a sunset slowly arriving. Very nice. I guess I wanted to cross the bridge to symbolically cross over to my 50's. New stage of life. Definitely a new outlook on life.
Fifty feels fine. Not scary or ancient, just pretty normal.
I'm thankful to be celebrating today...and everyday that the Lord gives me.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
The Big 5-0 and proud of it!
Today is my birthday...WOOHOO! And I'm 50 years old!!!
Yes, I told you right out how old I am. Since I have been diagnosed with cancer, there have been changes in my thinking in many areas. And this is just one of them...that every birthday is to be celebrated wholeheartedly, fully, joyfully and with great gratitude. Praise God that I have lived 50 years...that I have been so blessed with a precious husband, beautiful children, wonderful family, and more friends than I can count. I am a grateful 50 year old woman.
Thank You, O dear Lord, for all these people in my life. Thank You, dear Lord, for You, and all that You are to me. Thank You, dear Lord...for life.
In Jesus' Name.
Yes, I told you right out how old I am. Since I have been diagnosed with cancer, there have been changes in my thinking in many areas. And this is just one of them...that every birthday is to be celebrated wholeheartedly, fully, joyfully and with great gratitude. Praise God that I have lived 50 years...that I have been so blessed with a precious husband, beautiful children, wonderful family, and more friends than I can count. I am a grateful 50 year old woman.
Thank You, O dear Lord, for all these people in my life. Thank You, dear Lord, for You, and all that You are to me. Thank You, dear Lord...for life.
In Jesus' Name.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
First Radiation Treatment
Monday I went to see my chemo doctor. She was checking on how I did with my 8th treatment. The visit went well...Betsy came with me, which was so nice. Dr. Wilder said that she wants me to come back to see her in 7 weeks, after I've finished radiation. There are some more things to do with her, but she wants to wait until that is done...which is fine with me. I really like taking one thing at a time, instead of juggling different treatments at the same time.
Tuesday Betsy came with me again but this time we didn't have to drive to Little Rock. My radiation treatment is in Searcy, just a 5 minute drive from our home. That is WONDERFUL considering I go every day, Monday through Friday. This first day was extra long because they had to take special X-rays and measurements and markings to make sure they are getting exactly the right area and angle. It is a very precise thing...moving my head or shifting my body so that it is exactly lined up. After I was all lined up I had my first radiation dosage. You can't "feel" anything, anymore than you feel an X-ray at the dentist's office. I have to not move AT ALL, which is slightly uncomfortable for long periods. I kind of "freeze". The only thing that I can move is opening and closing my eyes. So I look around some, but mostly just close my eyes and either pray, sing hymns or recite Scripture in my mind. It helps me stay calm and stay still.
Today Tom went with me for my second treatment. Today was much shorter because there was no measuring to do. I have marks all over my neck and chest. They use laser and light to line me up and then go right on with the treatment. My visits now will only be about 20 minutes total. Tom got to go in the "cockpit" area with the technicians and monitors this time so he could see what they were doing. We also met with a social worker that told us all these nice extras that they offer: massages once a week for Tommy and me, nutritional counseling, regular counseling, a 10-week exercise program at a local health club for me, retreats, etc. They were very kind and helpful.
I have some specific prayer requests for all this. I'm concerned about my left arm. Sometimes radiation causes an arm that has had lymph nodes removed (which I did) to get something called lymphedema...a chronic swelling problem. Please pray that this won't happen with me. Also, just that the radiation will target the cancer but not damage my lungs, heart, throat (& voice), etc. since it will be administered in the areas of all those things. Also, that I won't have problems with skin burning or other side effects. This all sounds so specific, but they are concerns that I have and I am sharing my heart with you all. Thank you for listening.
And thank you for your faithful prayers. It will soon be 7 months since my diagnosis. Praise God for how far He has carried me! And Praise to His Name for all the intercessors that have prayed on my behalf. I can't believe how many people are praying. I am so, so grateful!!! Thank you so much.
I feel like I am starting a new phase, so I am trying to boost my emotional stamina to keep going. I have learned the best encouragement to my heart is the Word of God... just reading the Bible. It has always been an important part of my life and a source of wisdom and truth. But now I've found how much strength there is and power in the Word. The word I want to use to describe it is "magical"...which is a secular,worldly word. I think we all picture reading the words and something all of a sudden starts to come to life. But really, it is not the right word at all...because magic is not of the Lord, and what happens when we read God's word is so much greater than the empty power of magic, which the Bible tells us to stay away from anyway. The Word of God is alive! And it does "come to life", showing up in my life hour by hour. It is Him, the Living Word, walking me through this journey. I'm trying to memorize Scripture, which I haven't done in years, so that I can keep it ready, like food, when I need it.
That's all for today. THIS is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice in it.
Thank You, Holy God, for my great report last week, for Monday's appointment going well, and for being with me with this new phase. I praise You and thank You for Your love and faithfulness. In the Name Above All Names, Jesus.
Tuesday Betsy came with me again but this time we didn't have to drive to Little Rock. My radiation treatment is in Searcy, just a 5 minute drive from our home. That is WONDERFUL considering I go every day, Monday through Friday. This first day was extra long because they had to take special X-rays and measurements and markings to make sure they are getting exactly the right area and angle. It is a very precise thing...moving my head or shifting my body so that it is exactly lined up. After I was all lined up I had my first radiation dosage. You can't "feel" anything, anymore than you feel an X-ray at the dentist's office. I have to not move AT ALL, which is slightly uncomfortable for long periods. I kind of "freeze". The only thing that I can move is opening and closing my eyes. So I look around some, but mostly just close my eyes and either pray, sing hymns or recite Scripture in my mind. It helps me stay calm and stay still.
Today Tom went with me for my second treatment. Today was much shorter because there was no measuring to do. I have marks all over my neck and chest. They use laser and light to line me up and then go right on with the treatment. My visits now will only be about 20 minutes total. Tom got to go in the "cockpit" area with the technicians and monitors this time so he could see what they were doing. We also met with a social worker that told us all these nice extras that they offer: massages once a week for Tommy and me, nutritional counseling, regular counseling, a 10-week exercise program at a local health club for me, retreats, etc. They were very kind and helpful.
I have some specific prayer requests for all this. I'm concerned about my left arm. Sometimes radiation causes an arm that has had lymph nodes removed (which I did) to get something called lymphedema...a chronic swelling problem. Please pray that this won't happen with me. Also, just that the radiation will target the cancer but not damage my lungs, heart, throat (& voice), etc. since it will be administered in the areas of all those things. Also, that I won't have problems with skin burning or other side effects. This all sounds so specific, but they are concerns that I have and I am sharing my heart with you all. Thank you for listening.
And thank you for your faithful prayers. It will soon be 7 months since my diagnosis. Praise God for how far He has carried me! And Praise to His Name for all the intercessors that have prayed on my behalf. I can't believe how many people are praying. I am so, so grateful!!! Thank you so much.
I feel like I am starting a new phase, so I am trying to boost my emotional stamina to keep going. I have learned the best encouragement to my heart is the Word of God... just reading the Bible. It has always been an important part of my life and a source of wisdom and truth. But now I've found how much strength there is and power in the Word. The word I want to use to describe it is "magical"...which is a secular,worldly word. I think we all picture reading the words and something all of a sudden starts to come to life. But really, it is not the right word at all...because magic is not of the Lord, and what happens when we read God's word is so much greater than the empty power of magic, which the Bible tells us to stay away from anyway. The Word of God is alive! And it does "come to life", showing up in my life hour by hour. It is Him, the Living Word, walking me through this journey. I'm trying to memorize Scripture, which I haven't done in years, so that I can keep it ready, like food, when I need it.
That's all for today. THIS is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice in it.
Thank You, Holy God, for my great report last week, for Monday's appointment going well, and for being with me with this new phase. I praise You and thank You for Your love and faithfulness. In the Name Above All Names, Jesus.
Friday, May 11, 2007
Great news!
The doctor's office called this morning and said that the PETscan test showed no cancer. YEAH!!! That means that I will still have radiation treatments (I'll start Tuesday), but that there were no new areas that the cancer had moved to at this point. That was very comforting to hear!
This is a day of praise! Thank you so much for your prayers about this!
Lord, thank You, thank You so much for this good report! All praise and glory goes to You! In Jesus' Name.
This is a day of praise! Thank you so much for your prayers about this!
Lord, thank You, thank You so much for this good report! All praise and glory goes to You! In Jesus' Name.
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Nice weekend
This has been a sweet family weekend. Mary and I drove to Fayetteville, AR Friday afternoon. We'd never been there before. It is a beautiful part of Arkansas...nice small mountains. Not as big as Virgnina's mountains, but they were still very beautiful. We were all going there because Jamie's high school soccer team had made it to the state finals for 6A level sports in AR. Jamie went with the team, so he was already there. Then Tom flew in from CA Friday night. He'd been at the Pepperdine lectureships. I'm so glad he got to be there for the weekend events.
Saturday we went to the game and they WON!!!! State champions! Very exciting day for Searcy... and for Jamie. We were so proud of him and the whole team. We had such a nice time.
Tomorrow is my PETscan. I'll be going to White Co. hospital, so I don't have to go out of town this time. I'll meet with the doctor on Tuesday to discuss the results. She said they won't have a complete reading for 3 days, but she will have some preliminary information.
Also, my parents are here this weekend. That has been a nice side blessing!
That's all for today.
Saturday we went to the game and they WON!!!! State champions! Very exciting day for Searcy... and for Jamie. We were so proud of him and the whole team. We had such a nice time.
Tomorrow is my PETscan. I'll be going to White Co. hospital, so I don't have to go out of town this time. I'll meet with the doctor on Tuesday to discuss the results. She said they won't have a complete reading for 3 days, but she will have some preliminary information.
Also, my parents are here this weekend. That has been a nice side blessing!
That's all for today.
Friday, May 4, 2007
8th Treatment
It's been almost 2 weeks since I had my last treatment. I guess I imagined that because it was my last treatment it would be easier somehow. There is absolutely no logic to that!
It has been mentally better, knowing that it was the last. But physically, I've struggled. The main problem this time has been the food issue...feeling nauseous, needing to eat, but not knowing what to eat. First I have to think or see some food, then I try to imagine eating it. If it's a yes, then I proceed to tasting it. It has to pass the thinking about it and tasting it tests first before I can go on and actually eat it. I've been living on cereal and milk, corn, some soups, cereal, popcorn, cereal....you get the idea. Wacky.
I went to my new radiologist yesterday for the first time and I really, really liked her. She was kind and very knowledgable. She wants me to have a PETscan on Monday to see if there are any areas showing cancer in my body at this point. So much has happened since my last PETscan in Oct. '06. By looking at this test she will decide my radiation plan. I'll have 33 treatments. They are everyday, Mon-Fri.
I'm not worried about the radiation treatments, mostly because everyone I've talked to says that it is easier than chemo. I'm hoping that's true.
Pray needs? Please pray for Monday's test, for my body to heal from the effects of the chemo and now the radiation treatments. And...for healing overall.
I'm tired. Just being honest. But I know I have to keep going, so I'll keep pressing on.
"The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary and young men stumble and fall. But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40: 28-31
It has been mentally better, knowing that it was the last. But physically, I've struggled. The main problem this time has been the food issue...feeling nauseous, needing to eat, but not knowing what to eat. First I have to think or see some food, then I try to imagine eating it. If it's a yes, then I proceed to tasting it. It has to pass the thinking about it and tasting it tests first before I can go on and actually eat it. I've been living on cereal and milk, corn, some soups, cereal, popcorn, cereal....you get the idea. Wacky.
I went to my new radiologist yesterday for the first time and I really, really liked her. She was kind and very knowledgable. She wants me to have a PETscan on Monday to see if there are any areas showing cancer in my body at this point. So much has happened since my last PETscan in Oct. '06. By looking at this test she will decide my radiation plan. I'll have 33 treatments. They are everyday, Mon-Fri.
I'm not worried about the radiation treatments, mostly because everyone I've talked to says that it is easier than chemo. I'm hoping that's true.
Pray needs? Please pray for Monday's test, for my body to heal from the effects of the chemo and now the radiation treatments. And...for healing overall.
I'm tired. Just being honest. But I know I have to keep going, so I'll keep pressing on.
"The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary and young men stumble and fall. But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40: 28-31
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